Thursday, August 16, 2012
"How fickle my heart and woozy my eyes."
These last few days have been all about trying to stay positive, trying to feel happiness to the core of me. I've surrounded myself with music that makes me feel good, and I've taken more time to write and to read. But I have slipped. Trying to be optimistic about every situation is difficult. I did see this coming, but I didn't think I would find it so hard to fight.
The key to allowing the secret to work for you is to change the way you think, feel and want. I can't seem to find the time to feel, my life is so hectic. I'm so used to being like a robot, my life is not routine but I am always on autopilot, doing just the things that I have to do running on fumes. My life as I'm sure many others lives are is about an 18 hour day that consists of about 200 miles of driving, countless tasks that can't wait and people I can't stand. But that is how I viewed it before, now I'm trying to live in the present, but that just makes me more exhausted to feel and to be in the moment, to experience each day as its happening instead of thinking about all the tasks of tomorrow or just being stuck in my mind the whole day through wondering how I managed to drive to my destination when I barely remember leaving. But Optimism Optimism right? that is what I am struggling with, and this is what I will conquer! I will use the secret so that the universe can provide for me all the things I need and want out of life, I am strong enough and worthy of the life I WANT to live, not just the life I feel is being given to me.
(currently listening to Lost Star by Snail Quail)
Summary of days 3/4/5&6 of using The Secret
Veronica Pickles
Sunday, August 12, 2012
Day 2 so much to do..continued!
The Secret task #2 : Make a list of things for which you are grateful
Lets start with music, I am so grateful for the ability to listen to music. I am very grateful to have all of my limbs, to not have any disability. I am grateful for my health. Family comes right after that I may be disappointed by them and they may drive me crazy but my huge and infuriating family is something I can't imagine a life without. Next there is my friends, my high school chums that have stuck with me for these 10 years, especially my best friend Denise; without which I think I would be on the track to be a paralegal only dreaming of taking the time to write, bored out of my mind day in and day out. I am grateful for my mother, grateful that she supports my crazy ideas. I am so grateful to live in America where anything is possible. I am so grateful to live in a time that doesn't shun me for being a woman but will actually help me more because it, such as with government business loans. I am grateful for my mind, for the thoughts that invade my head on a day to day basis that I feel must be unique because everyone seems to think in a way that is so similar to the way they speak, whereas my thoughts are many voices all at once accompanied with images and snipets of what I can only describe as video, random characters doing out of character things every time I close my eyes. I am grateful for the ability to learn, to read, to think, to analyze, to remember. I am grateful for the internet because it gives me the power to meet people from all over the world, to express myself and have people care, to care for people I would most likely never have met, to be welcomed into a life I would not have known existed. I believe that dimensions are no more than each persons world, the way they view it, the life they have. I can never experience what another being is experiencing, I will always have my unique outlook, I will feel, and judge and dream differently than anyone I encounter and I love that.
Day 2 The Secret
(currently listening to tongue tied by Grouplove)
Veronica Pickles
Lets start with music, I am so grateful for the ability to listen to music. I am very grateful to have all of my limbs, to not have any disability. I am grateful for my health. Family comes right after that I may be disappointed by them and they may drive me crazy but my huge and infuriating family is something I can't imagine a life without. Next there is my friends, my high school chums that have stuck with me for these 10 years, especially my best friend Denise; without which I think I would be on the track to be a paralegal only dreaming of taking the time to write, bored out of my mind day in and day out. I am grateful for my mother, grateful that she supports my crazy ideas. I am so grateful to live in America where anything is possible. I am so grateful to live in a time that doesn't shun me for being a woman but will actually help me more because it, such as with government business loans. I am grateful for my mind, for the thoughts that invade my head on a day to day basis that I feel must be unique because everyone seems to think in a way that is so similar to the way they speak, whereas my thoughts are many voices all at once accompanied with images and snipets of what I can only describe as video, random characters doing out of character things every time I close my eyes. I am grateful for the ability to learn, to read, to think, to analyze, to remember. I am grateful for the internet because it gives me the power to meet people from all over the world, to express myself and have people care, to care for people I would most likely never have met, to be welcomed into a life I would not have known existed. I believe that dimensions are no more than each persons world, the way they view it, the life they have. I can never experience what another being is experiencing, I will always have my unique outlook, I will feel, and judge and dream differently than anyone I encounter and I love that.
Day 2 The Secret
(currently listening to tongue tied by Grouplove)
Veronica Pickles
Day two, so much to do!
First assignment of the day: Make a wish list in present tense
I awake, walk over to my window and draw the shades letting in the soft sunlight to shine over my spacious bedroom in a condo I still can't believe I own, but I am so happy I do. I am a 24 year old girl living in a way that no one in my family could ever even have imagined. I am the owner of a successful Bookstore that is nationally recognized for its unique qualities. I have a style that is 1960's meets metal. I have the love of a man named Christopher Delarm, a man I had a relationship with a few years previously but who at the time lacked ambition but now has become my most valued employee, with an extensive knowledge of literature, the underground music scene and current events. I am the proud owner of 2006 black Nissan Altima with a V6 engine, deep purple interior, tinted windows and a moon roof. I am a Published author and getting a lot of recognition, my first book tour was nationwide and I've sold millions of copies in the United States as well as 14 other countries. I am comfortable in my body, and have finally solved many issues that I have had since childhood. Money comes easily and frequently.
I hope that will do.
Day 2 of using The Secret
(Currently listening to 1979 by the smashing pumpkins)
Veronica Pickles
Saturday, August 11, 2012
How to..what to..can I? YES!
Last night I couldn't sleep, this is a normal occurrence for me but usually I just put on a harry potter podcast (mugglecast.com) or listen to YA author John Green talk about something while playing a FIFA video game (youtube.com/hankgames), but on this night I didn't feel like doing even that. I had this hankering to watch The Secret this movie based on the best selling book of the same name. I had been skeptical of this book since my days working at Borders. I merely sold the book, never promoted it or bothered to learn more about it than it was the inspiration for tons of people to go out and make vision boards. So the fact that I felt an urge to watch it was something I fought for a few minutes before finally succumbing to that urge, after all the worst it could do is put me to bed and that wouldn't be a bad thing. I fired up my Netflix and found it with ease ( I had seen it lurking in my suggestions before). From the start I only wanted to give it partial attention, bringing with me my notebook to figure out bills and list the various tasks I needed to accomplish the next day.
Within the first five minutes I was using that notebook to take note of everything I was learning from this program. I was aware that your mind is a powerful thing and I have heard that if you can visualize it you can have it since a class I took in 7th grade to try to lose weight (a better me in 2003). But with guidelines it was something different, with all the tips I felt like this could work, this could be it! This is explains why so far this year I have been getting nothing but death and debt so I keep dwelling on it and what do I keep getting more of? Death and debt.
I finally feel as if it is in my control, in my power to change my world, to change what has been going on. I've been in such a funk, in such a depression since Borders closed, that place was my world. I was an enthusiastic employee of that place and long before that I had been a Borders enthusiast. I spent much of my time in Borders browsing and reading and drinking Seattle's Best coffee, having the time of my life. There will never be another place like it. I feel much like a widow, the thing I loved and devoted so much of my time to no longer exists, all I have are my memories.
But this brings me to my next point after The Power was over, instantly after it ended I got this great idea! I've thought of opening up my own bookstore before but this idea was everything I have ever wanted all rolled into one! A bookstore that utilizes all of the resources I have with my friends and family, all of our talents rolled into one place in a way that could only be well received in a downtown phoenix that's always looking to expand its unique shops. My idea is for a bookstore that has live music from local bands of all genres, art Wednesdays, community events, a coffee shop that sells a coffee that is only available online right now, sells homemade baked goods, features the magazine collection that Borders once provided minus the magazines you can acquire anywhere, books that hopefully will have the eBook with them, as well as a nice selection of rare books (something I've made a habit of collecting), merchandise created by me of things that are related to classic and understated books, as well as hosts a book club of only new books that I'm sure will get a huge following to keep people ahead of the curb. A Borders feel bookstore with a twist. I've already got a name, access to the coffee, baked goods, bands and artists who would be eager to play and display their work, and an idea of how the book world works from my time at Borders. This is the first time I ever felt like any of my ideas were doable, this is doable. I can see a place for this already, there is an empty space right by ASU downtown and right where the vegan shops and indie clothes are, where once a month there is an art walk, where the type of clientele I'm sure to attract is already hanging out. Now what I need is the first bit of funding, and a few other things. But that is where The Secret comes into play, I'm sure I can do this, I'm sure this will happen. And now I'm going to plan it as if it's already funded, and I am sure the universe will align to make my dream a reality.
(currently listening to VCR by The XX)
Veronica Pickles Day 1 of using The Power
Within the first five minutes I was using that notebook to take note of everything I was learning from this program. I was aware that your mind is a powerful thing and I have heard that if you can visualize it you can have it since a class I took in 7th grade to try to lose weight (a better me in 2003). But with guidelines it was something different, with all the tips I felt like this could work, this could be it! This is explains why so far this year I have been getting nothing but death and debt so I keep dwelling on it and what do I keep getting more of? Death and debt.
I finally feel as if it is in my control, in my power to change my world, to change what has been going on. I've been in such a funk, in such a depression since Borders closed, that place was my world. I was an enthusiastic employee of that place and long before that I had been a Borders enthusiast. I spent much of my time in Borders browsing and reading and drinking Seattle's Best coffee, having the time of my life. There will never be another place like it. I feel much like a widow, the thing I loved and devoted so much of my time to no longer exists, all I have are my memories.
But this brings me to my next point after The Power was over, instantly after it ended I got this great idea! I've thought of opening up my own bookstore before but this idea was everything I have ever wanted all rolled into one! A bookstore that utilizes all of the resources I have with my friends and family, all of our talents rolled into one place in a way that could only be well received in a downtown phoenix that's always looking to expand its unique shops. My idea is for a bookstore that has live music from local bands of all genres, art Wednesdays, community events, a coffee shop that sells a coffee that is only available online right now, sells homemade baked goods, features the magazine collection that Borders once provided minus the magazines you can acquire anywhere, books that hopefully will have the eBook with them, as well as a nice selection of rare books (something I've made a habit of collecting), merchandise created by me of things that are related to classic and understated books, as well as hosts a book club of only new books that I'm sure will get a huge following to keep people ahead of the curb. A Borders feel bookstore with a twist. I've already got a name, access to the coffee, baked goods, bands and artists who would be eager to play and display their work, and an idea of how the book world works from my time at Borders. This is the first time I ever felt like any of my ideas were doable, this is doable. I can see a place for this already, there is an empty space right by ASU downtown and right where the vegan shops and indie clothes are, where once a month there is an art walk, where the type of clientele I'm sure to attract is already hanging out. Now what I need is the first bit of funding, and a few other things. But that is where The Secret comes into play, I'm sure I can do this, I'm sure this will happen. And now I'm going to plan it as if it's already funded, and I am sure the universe will align to make my dream a reality.
(currently listening to VCR by The XX)
Veronica Pickles Day 1 of using The Power
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